On September 11th we got together to say goodbye to Jeremy. I spoke. This is what I said. The first time I saw Jeremy I was fourteen and he was sixteen and he was skateboarding down the halls of Oak Bay High School flying a Millennium Falcon. The closest way I can describe the feelingContinue reading “Eulogy”
Author Archives: linabranter
CAST: A Primer on Letting Go, Part 5
The T in CAST stands for Trust. Trust is a big word. We use it a lot, to mean very different things. It is both a noun (to have trust) and a verb (to trust someone). From the Old Norse traust, it first appeared in the English language around 1200 and meant something equivalent toContinue reading “CAST: A Primer on Letting Go, Part 5”
CAST: A Primer on Letting Go, Part 4
Image: By StooMathiesen – Flickr: Railway tracks 2 028, CC BY 2.0 The S in CAST stands for shift, as in shift perspective. I didn’t understand until this last year what it meant to focus on myself. I mean, I knew on the surface that I had to get my shit together, move away beforeContinue reading “CAST: A Primer on Letting Go, Part 4”
A Quick Aside to Balance Perspective
I am going to interrupt our regularly schedule programming as something has been bothering me about these last posts and I think I finally put my finger on it. When I write on this blog, I try to be as truthful to my experience as possible, try to give it the nuance it deserves. MyContinue reading “A Quick Aside to Balance Perspective”
CAST: A Primer on Letting Go, Part 3
The A in CAST stands for Accept. Accept what? Why reality, of course. Imagination is a double-edged sword and is especially dangerous when heartbreak is involved. My wholly unfounded, but deeply held suspicion is that when people are at the peak of rejection they will either start rolling down one of two slopes: revenge orContinue reading “CAST: A Primer on Letting Go, Part 3”
CAST: A Primer on Letting Go, Part 2
The C in CAST stands for compassion. I know shocking, right? But this is more complicated and nuanced than it looks like at first glance, because it involves not only compassion for yourself, but for your ex. You can decide which one is more difficult… Self-compassion If I have learned anything in these last fewContinue reading “CAST: A Primer on Letting Go, Part 2”
CAST: A Primer on Letting Go from Someone Who Hates to Let Go
When divorce happens, and your heart is breaking, people like to tell you that you have to let go, that it is over, that he didn’t deserve you anyway, that he is gone and you have to move on. Blah, blah, blah. For the first few years after the divorce, telling me to let goContinue reading “CAST: A Primer on Letting Go from Someone Who Hates to Let Go”
Why I Commemorate the Anniversary of my Husband Leaving Me
Mostly, life is a series of days that resemble each other. We get up, go to work, see friends, watch TV, read a book. If it is a good day, we might go for a hike to a nice vista, travel somewhere new, attend a particularly fun party or enjoy some nice sex. If itContinue reading “Why I Commemorate the Anniversary of my Husband Leaving Me”
A Personal Policy Brief on the State of my Reading
Background Since I could decipher the little swiggles on the page as words, I have identified as a reader. Reading was my thing, books my happy place and my comfort object, the thing I never left home without. I never felt too upset if I had to wait in line because I had a bookContinue reading “A Personal Policy Brief on the State of my Reading”
On the Loss of Old Dreams
On how the hardest part of divorce is letting go of the dream of happily ever after.
Lina Branter 