A world of possibilities

My father-in-law is a wise man. During the years that I have known him, he has said many things that I take as words to live by. He phoned last night to ask how the interview went, and we talked a little about my fears of whether I do or do not get the job. He reminded me that if I stay focussed and just do what I want to do, things will work out. And I know it has worked out for him- he has been able to keep painting for a good sixty years now without any break. Of course, he worked part-time as an art teacher and has a prettty awesome wife who knew exactly what she was getting into when she married him, but I think, in general that he is right.

And that is what I am missing. You see, I am lacking faith that it will all work out. All I know is the conventional way of making a living: you know, going to school for the right certificate, applying for a job, getting the job, waiting for the twice monthly paycheck. I am petrified at the idea of fishing for work. First of all, it might involve talking to strangers. I am not even that good at talking to the people I know. Second of all, my family might starve.

So here I am, contemplating a total of three hours commute, something I vowed never to do. Now, this got me to thinking. If the word ‘never’ is so malleable, so inconstant, so flexible- what else could I contemplate that I vowed I would never do? I could run with sticks in my mouth. I could do one of those polar bear swims, or jump out of a non burning plane just for fun. I could start writing stream of consciousness beat poetry. Or, heaven forbid, I could take the leap, quit my job and focus on what I really want to do- just write. Naaaah. That’s crazy talk….

One thought on “A world of possibilities

  1. If you are going on skydiving junkets, you MUST include me in your plans.Also include French Panic. She would like it, I believe.I’ve only skydived once. It was the scariest thing I remember doing. But on the plus side, life seemed much much sweeter for many hours after.Polar bear swims are mostly just stupid.

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