Quotes of the day 3

A writer is a person for whom writing is more difficult than it is for other people. – Thomas Mann
Again, one of those quotes that hits me in the face with its truthfulness. It is hard to write. I liken it to pulling teeth except in the case of writing, the pain never goes away.

I have the heart of a child. I keep it in a jar on my shelf. – Robert Bloch
Just ’cause it is funny. And subverts any sort of sentimental nonsense which I am always in favor of.

The shortest distance between two points is under construction. – Noelie Altito
Tell me about it. This quote resonates on two levels for me right now. First of all, our house is a construction site that only recently got some floors. The walls are still yet to come but we are waiting for the next disaster to occur before we get our hopes up. Secondly, I live in Montreal where the construction on the major highway out of town has been perpetual for the last ten years. And it is the worse designed highway you have ever seen. I would not be surprised if urban planners from all over the world did not have to make a special trip here to see what not to do.

I am a kind of paranoiac in reverse. I suspect people of plotting to make me happy. – JD Salinger
Ahh, J.D. Tell it like it is. It is almost as annoying having someone trying to make you happy than trying to make you unhappy. Basically I just like to be left alone, like my pal Mr. Salinger. I too shared Holden’s dream of moving to California pretending I was a deaf mute and working in the local gas station.

How can you govern a country which has 246 varieties of cheese? – Charles De Gaulle
How can you govern an appetite that desires 246 varieties of cheeses?

Equations are the devil’s sentences. – Stephen Colbert
Why? Why?Because they are trying to introduce some order in this god forsaken chaos? I disagree completely. Equations are what allow us to make our own order M. Colbert. So stick that up your pipe and smoke it…

An expert is a person who avoids small error as he sweeps on to the grand fallacy.
– Benjamin Stolberg
Man this seems like such a good thing to remember in these days where we only trust the certified. What ever happened to experience? And besides, an expert is just someone that is extremely familiar with the status quo…

We can lick gravity, but sometimes the paperwork is overwhelming.
– Wernher von Braun
I am not sure what this means but it sounds funny so I thought I would put it in. Plus, the idea of licking gravity-funny! Like licking the laws of physics or someone’s anger…

Nothing fixes a thing so intensely in the memory as the wish to forget it.
– Michel de Montaigne
I can’t remember why I liked this quote.

If the Phone Doesn’t Ring, It’s Me
– Jimmy Buffett
Oh, yippee! I am going to put this on my answering machine. I am one of those people that hate the phone. Don’t get me wrong- I appreciate its usefulness. You phone someone up, you ask the person a question, they give it to you and then you hang up. But then it rings and you have to talk to the person on the other end just when you thought you were safe at home and could sit down and go about your business. No schedule, no nothing, it just rings out of the blue giving me a heart attack that quickly turns into an angina of irritation. So if the phone doesn’t ring, it’s me, people. And don’t call me, I’ll call you.

No one gossips about other people’s secret virtues. – Bertrand Russell
Man speak for yourself Bertrand. I gab about how great people are all the time. You cynical, pragmatist you.

Any American who is prepared to run for president should automatically, by definition, be disqualified from ever doing so.
– Gore Vidal
Do I even need to say anything about this? Aren’t the implications obvious? Don’t give power to the power hungry, they never fill up.

The more original a discovery, the more obvious it seems afterwards.
– Arthur Koestler
Yeah, like toaster waffles.

I wish people who have trouble communicating would just shut up.
– Tom Lehrer
Fine. I’m shutting up now.